Those “Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Days”…

Ever read that kids’ book called “Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day”?

Image and quote: Do you feel alone in the world? I just wish they understood! I just wish they knew what it felt like to have a terrible horrible no good very bad day.Ever have a day like that?  Where something just seems to really get under your skin, and you end up having this intense emotional reaction?  Maybe it’s your baby, your partner, a kid, your boss, the weather, your hair, the toothpaste cap left off the tube, the person tailgating you in the car…

It can be the most inoffensive-seeming event, but you feel totally triggered by it… And sometimes then, those events seem to trigger a cascade of more of the same.  You end up like Alexander in the story – with one triggering misery-inducing event after another, consuming your time and energy over the course of a day.  It’s exhausting.

What’s going on?  And, more importantly, what can you do, to turn your day around and get yourself back on a happier, more uplifting track?

Well, to answer that first question – part of what’s going on is happening inside our brains.  The human brain records all our experiences – all our perceptions, thoughts and interpretations about what happens, in every nano-second.  These become our beliefs and our habits.  And they evoke emotional responses in us – some good, some bad; some wonderful and exhilarating, some excruciating, sad and painful; some raging mad, some neutral and indifferent.

This has been going on since we were tiny infants, trying to make sense of what life is all about, and how we fit into it. 

“What’s it All About, Alphie”?

As this old song title suggests, figuring this out is at the center of human existence – as our consciousness works to understand the meaning of life, and us in it.

And human consciousness has this funny thing about it – once we’ve created a belief, no matter how rational or irrational, we tend to look for validation of it.  This means, of all the sensory information coming into our brains in every nano-second, we mostly frequently pay attention to what’s already familiar.  (Scientists have surmised that what we consciously attend to is actually only about a meagre 2 – 5% of all the information that’s available).

These experiences we attend to become patterns.  And these patterns have a physical presence in our brains – they become our neural pathways.

Image and quote from blog - The patterns and habits which are the most well-developed turn into elaborate neural networks – like the roots and branches of an ancient tree...The patterns and habits which are the most well-developed turn into elaborate neural networks – like the roots and branches of an ancient tree.  They’re the ones which are most familiar to us… and the most challenging to change.  After all, we’ve invested a lot of time and energy in developing them.  And we believe them to be true…

Even the ones which cause us pain and suffering.  Like Alexander, at these times, we feel unable to do more than just suffer from these “terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad” days or experiences in life.  Sometimes, they just seem to keep piling up – to keep on keeping on, whether we want them to or not!

Often, we no longer even consciously recognize the thoughts and beliefs that first created them, and which continue to get reinforced.  All we see and feel is the emotional reactivity which follows in their wake, once those old neural networks in our brains somehow get triggered by an experience.

So, how about that 2nd question – “What can we do about this?”

Well, I’ve been searching for over 40 years for answers to this question: both for me in my own life, and for the clients I’ve worked with in therapy.

There are many things we can do.  Some work better than others.  Many can take a long time to work effectively and reflexively…

At the heart of it, we need to develop and then maintain new habits, supported by new neural pathways and networks.  Depending on the modality or tool chosen, this can sometimes take many years.  And it’s trickier than it sounds.

Very few people, unless utter desperation is fueling their efforts, seem able to see it through for long enough to make significant, longstanding change – it usually just takes so much effort, to make and then maintain changes.  It seems only too easy for our human brain to re-set itself to those old beliefs, familiar habits and routine patterns.

The fastest and most expedient tool I’ve found is in working at the level of vibration, of sound.

9 Reasons Why This is So:

  1. Image and quote: Quantum physicists discovered that physical atoms are made up of vortices of energy that are constantly spinning and vibrating, each one radiating its own unique energy signature. Therefore, if we really want to observe ourselves and find out what we are, we are really beings of energy and vibration, radiating our own unique energy signature -this is fact and is what quantum physics has shown us time and time again.Well, quantum physicists have discovered that at the most infintessimally small unit of creation, of life, there is no solid matter.  There’s just energy moving.  We are all actually energy moving – frequencies in motion.

So, working at the level of frequencies means aligning ourselves with what we’re made of.  It’s a natural process, which communicates directly with who and what we are, at our most basic, fundamental level.

  1. Our brains record everything we’ve experienced, whether we consciously remember it or not.  In fact, most of the time, (again, scientists have discovered that about 95% of what drives our behavior is unconscious to uswe have no conscious recollection of what’s driving our emotional reactions and our behavior.
  1. Our voice is part of our physical body – it also holds all our memories and experiences, good, bad and indifferent.  Including the unconscious ones.
  1. Our voice is unique to each of us. And unlike our fingerprints (which are also unique to each of us) our voice actually changes over time, depending on how we’re feeling and what we’re experiencing.  This means a voice sample holds a “real-time” measure of our stress level – of what’s in balance in us, as well as what’s out of whack.
  1. You get immediate feedback.  Unlike, for example, some forms of meditation which can take years (sometimes decades) of daily practice, most people in most sessions can feel an immediate difference in their relief from stress, and an increase in their relaxation.
  1. When you do a voice assessment session, the computerized program is able to analyze (using over one and a half billion possible sounds in the human voice) precisely where your voice is out of balance… where you are uniquely holding stress in your voice… in your body… in your brain.

The program then creates the specific, individualized frequencies which will bring you back into greater balance.  You don’t need to remember what created the stress, imbalance, or negative emotion.  You don’t need to be consciously aware of what habits or beliefs are holding you back, and limiting you from stepping into more of your potential.  All you need to do is listen to your balancing tones. 

  1. At the level of vibration, once it’s cleared, it’s cleared.  You know this has occurred when you no longer have that wild emotional reactivity when the same ‘triggering’ event occurs.  Sometimes, for bigger or more deeply ingrained patterns/beliefs (like that ancient oak tree with the well-developed roots and branches), this clearing can take more than one listening session.

    Image and quote hange your brain, change your life."8.  When you change your brain’s neural circuitry, you’re investing in long-term, more permanent forms of change (the really good news here is, that neuro-scientists have also discovered our brains are neuro-plastic and can be changed, no matter how young or old we are).

It’s the most powerful shortcut I know of, for making significant changes.  As psychologist Helena Reilly (co-creator of Quantum Sound Therapy) would say: “Change your brain; change your life.”

  1. Furthermore, when your balancing tones are amplified by listening to them through one of the iQubes (all of which create a unified, coherent field of energy where making change becomes easier, because of the coherence), your brain also has the opportunity to get efficiently re-trained into states of greater harmony and relaxation. This includes bypassing the usual patterns of resistance which often get activated when making changes.

As you continue to re-train your brain by listening to the specific frequencies that uniquely create greater relaxation for you, you begin to have fewer and fewer of those “terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad days” or experiences.

And when they do happen, you have an effective tool to short-circuit that pathway in your brain – to re-route your brain into instead developing new neural networks of greater relaxation and inner peace.  This occurs naturally, just by listening to your frequencies… and allowing your stress (wherever it came from) to dissolve.

With these tools, now “Change your brain; change your life” couldn’t be easier.  All you need to do is listen.

To read more about having a voice assessment session, go here

To find out more about who I am, and my history of working with stress (in others as well as my own), you can read about that here…

To read about the transformative experiences of some others through using voice assessment and iQube technology, go here…

If you have questions you’d like to ask about, please feel free to ask them below, or to contact me here.


  1. Tatijana Goreta says:

    Great info ! Would love to Book a session!!!

    • Deb Svanefelt says:

      Hi Tatijana – I’d love to work with you! Have you seen my different groups? Or are you looking for an individual session? Let me know – if you use my ‘contact me’ page, I’ll see it immediately and get right back to you. Looking forward to meeting you, With blessings, deb

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